12th Night and You-Know-What
That's right- it's my birthday. Can you believe I hit the quarter century mark at 5:25 this afternoon? Yeah, me neither. I know 25 years is the silver anniversary, but is it also the silver birthday?

I was going to wake up early and treat myself to my favorite breakfast in NY at Veselka (world's best pancakes, scrambled eggs, and hash) but I decided against it. Cash is running seriously low since my roommate won't be able to give me his half of the rent until the 12th (which was due on the 1st, mind you). He overdrew his account and now it's frozen for the rest of the week. My bank account just covered the full rent along with a smattering of bills that were due- my family's 3 cell phones, cable/phone/internet, car insurance, my college loan (a no interest loan, thank god), and electricity. Within the next few days I dread receiving all of those bills yet again in my mailbox (plus a new one- gas, because I was finally able to get the stove hooked up last month). It's a vicious little monthly cycle it is. So what exactly are the perks and benefits of being 25 again?

Then I was going to treat myself to lunch outside the confines of my office's "break room," but it didn't seem sensible to let a giant bowl of chicken salad in my fridge go bad. Time to tighten the belt and live a bit more frugally, Stevens, birthday or not. I had also planned on treating myself to a Dunkin Donuts coffee and chocolate chip muffin during my morning break, but like a dummy I went and left my free coupons at home.

I wrote into their website a few weeks ago because the muffins at the Dunkin Donuts on 8th Avenue were deplorable. All undercooked and absolutely no crusty sugar sprinkled on top- they were about as bland as melba toast. They call that a muffin? Someone get quality control on line one, stat! I went into consumer reports mode and took it upon myself to let DD HQ know what was going down at one of their branches. Two weeks later I received 4 coupons for a free medium coffee and my choice of bagel, donut, or muffin. Honestly, I just wanted the muffin situation rectified; the coupons were a surprise bonus. But not much of a bonus when you leave them in the top drawer of your desk on the morning you want to use one.

Aside from being my birthday, it's a very special day for a Sloshball alumnus, Mr. Eli Roth. A very good friend to my brother back in his NYU days, Eli is releasing his second horror movie today (his first was another low-grade horror flick called Cabin Fever). For movie number two, Eli delivers to us "Hostel," and it's even getting a nationwide release. If you watch TV, you've probably seen an ad or two for it over the last few weeks. It seems like any horror movie released these days, even if it garners awful reviews like The Fog, manages to open reasonably well, so I think it's going to be successful. It only cost 5 million to make. They'll have no problem making a profit on it, but the big question is, "Where will it rank in the weekend box office?" I wouldn't be all that shocked if it came in at number one. I know Kong and Narnia are raking in a lot of dough these days, but holiday vacation's over and the kids are back in school. With recent horror movies opening so well of late, anything could happen.

Hostel looks and sounds extremely gorey. These young guys go to Slovakia to check out the girls and end up becoming victims where people pay $25,000 to torture their captives any way they like. Graphic, disturbing and stomach-churning? You betchya!

Eli is one of the most talented and overt self-promoters I've ever met. It's really amazing to see the guy work a crowd and sell himself to even the most skeptical of audiences. I remember meeting him back when I was 12 years old, and even as a sophomore in college he was always "on" and had energy and charisma to spare. He's been able to package his talents well over the years and make quite a name for himself, and now he has Quentin Tarantino exec-producing his movies. He's gone from taking out the catcher during a muddy sloshball game to spending Christmas day at Quentin's house with The RZA.

So what's up for tonight? All this week I couldn't decide where I wanted to go for dinner. If I can't go out for breakfast or lunch, at least I know I'll eat like a king tonight, but where? Turkish or BBQ? Falafel and doner kebabs or pulled pork and macaroni and cheese? After much inner-debate, I decided on Turkish, and I found a place whose kitchen is open till 11 so Nick can come (his show gets off early on Fridays at 10). I invited a bunch of people, and I think a little less than half will be able to come. Unfortunately a lot of my old college roommates are out of town, and I was really looking forward to seeing them. And being a Friday, a lot of people are heading out for the weekend or already have other plans. I still think I'll be able to round up a dinner party of 8 or 9, so I think it's going to be a great night. My only reservation about the party is that very few of my friends who are coming know each other, so the beginning of the evening could be a hair stilted. But I figure once we start eating all that delicious food and the raki starts to flow freely, we'll all be blood brothers by the time the waiter brings out the baklava for dessert.