|
|
|
November 28th, 2006
12:05 am
Oh, I miss you, livejournal...
|
February 10th, 2006
12:34 pm - Time For A Move
Nobody on my friends list seems to update with much regularity anymore, and I don't really take advantage of the livejournal communities, so I've decided to abandon this journal for now and take up online residence elsewhere. It's been a fun ride, old LJ, but it's getting a little too subdued over here. If you want to read any more of my random thoughts, semi-supported arguments, and incomplete ideas, head on over to http://thegeoffman.blogspot.com
|
February 9th, 2006
11:29 am - Little League Yanks
http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/minors/articles/2006/02/08/spinners_want_yankees_teams_out_of_youth_leagues/
I saw this story in the Boston Globe this morning. Apparently, the local single A farm team for the Red Sox, the Lowell Spinners, suggested that all New England-area little leagues replace any teams with the NY Yankees moniker and uniforms with those of the Spinners.
About time someone did something about this! The Spinners organizations said that for any leagues willing to make the change, the Spinners would pick up the tab for the new uniforms.
What's my personal investment in this developing story? Unfortunately, I was one of the countless young victims who was forced to play as a Yankee in little league baseball. From the ages of 13-15 when I played Babe Ruth Ball, I was a Yankee. And I hated it. At the time I wondered, 'Why couldn't I have lived in the other part of town where they only used National League teams?' We had the full pinstripe uniform and I felt like a slimy traitor every time I had to suit up for a game. Once the game started I tried to forget that I was playing for the Yankees, but it was always somewhere in the back of my mind.
I realize it was only a team name, a hat, and a uniform I had to wear for 15 games every spring, but it really ticked me off at the time. The one team in major league baseball that I loathed and detested, the one organization I vowed never to root for under any circumstance, and here I was not only wearing their iconic cap, but sporting the whole get-up and cheering "Let's go Yankees!" from the bench.
While this whole Spinners/Yankees swap idea is silly and sophomoric, I still think it's brilliant and something all local leagues should, at the very least, discuss. Maybe there are a few little league -playing closet-Yankee fans in the area, but on the whole, Massachusetts is a Yankee-hating state, especially the eastern part.
And if the Spinners are willing to foot the bill for the new uniforms and equipment, why not go for it? You'd be promoting a creative, up-and-coming local organization in the progress instead of the colloquial "evil empire."
|
February 6th, 2006
12:45 pm - Forgotten Puppy Bowl
Hot damn! I completely forgot to tune into Puppy Bowl II on Animal Planet yesterday afternoon. I spent much of the afternoon lounging around Nick's apartment, drinking Dunkin Donuts coffee, chowing on a chocolate chip muffin, and watching The Baxter. But all that was for naught because I missed the freakin' Puppy Bowl. If life had a 'rewind' button like they do on them VCRs, I would press said rewind button and then watch the Puppy Bowl, making my Superbowl Sunday a bit more complete.
The aforementioned post brought to you by Purina Chow Hound Kibbles and Bits.
|
11:16 am - Chicken In A Biskit!
You know someone was bored around the Nabsico Food Laboratory when they made up this dastardly concoction.
Really, what on earth were they thinking? Did some hot sales rep from Purdue use her feminine wiles to get these folks to smush chicken into their crackers? Next month it will be lamb tortillas and duck reins. Yeah, duck reins. With a special venison dipping sauce (offered in regular and low sodium varieties).
For the love of US grade A poultry, can we please keep chicken out of our crackers? And while we're at it, let's keep guns out of schools and mind-altering drugs drugs out of our kids' heads.
If Nabsico felt the need to change the traditional spelling of biscuit, why not go all the way? Replace the S with a Z and get Fred Durst to be the national pitchman. I'm sure he could use the work.
|
February 1st, 2006
January 16th, 2006
04:56 pm - The Drunken Unraveling of Jordan Knight
Great PR for your new album, Jordan! Ah, those kooky New Kids. I wonder what Danny and Jon are up to...
------------------------------------------------------
It's like last call as the former New Kid on the Block spends an evening in the North End
By Meredith Goldstein, Globe Staff | January 12, 2006
I'm hugging Jordan Knight, a former member of New Kids on the Block, in front of Strega in the North End. It's a little after 9 p.m., and I'm pretty sure he's had way too much to drink (about eight double vodkas and beers, according to our bill).
He looks at the cab that's pulled over to take him home, and he whispers in my ear, ''Want to come?"
I don't know if he's kidding, but for a moment, it feels like it's 1989 all over again. My stomach is churning, and I'm living the dream I know I must have had when I was 11, that someday Jordan Knight would want to whisk me away in a taxi.
But let's rewind.
I get to Strega at about 6 p.m., where I'm supposed to meet Jordan Knight, his wife, and their friends for dinner. The assignment is to hang out with them on their double date, shadowing a typical night in the life of a former boy-band star from Dorchester who, at 35, is trying for a comeback with a new solo album, ''The Fix."
But when I get to the restaurant, Jordan's alone at the bar. The wives didn't come, he says. It's going to be just the three of us -- Jordan, his promoter/pal Michael Patt, and I. (And a photographer to capture the night.)
It starts off as expected. When Michael arrives, he and Jordan talk about music and their kids. Jordan's new single, ''Where Is Your Heart Tonight," is a ballad, and Mike is trying to market the song to easy-listening stations.
Mike asks what Jordan is drinking. He's already told me. ''It's something sweet, like a watered-down vanilla Bacardi thing," he says.
We talk about Jordan's son, Dante, a first-grader who likes his dad's Play Station Portable. Jordan and I talk about backup dancers and about how we think they're limiting.
Jordan has now downed a few of those vanilla Bacardi things, which I later find out are double vodkas, and he's mixing them with beer. I tell him to eat, but he's not interested.
''I ate a big meal at, like, 4," he says.
Then he begins to make serious faces, stands up, and leans against a wall. When I look confused, he tells me he's posing for the photographer I brought with me.
I tell Jordan to sit down, that the pictures from the evening are supposed to be candid.
''I'm just trying to get my man a good shot," he says, referring to the photographer and adjusting his scarf, which I assure him looks good.
Soon, Jordan runs out of the restaurant onto Hanover Street, where he poses under a tree. The photographer reluctantly follows.
When Jordan comes back to the table, I ask him to list the artists he'd most like to perform with, living or dead.
''James Brown. Beatles. Michael Jackson. Luther Vandross."
We talk more about music, and then he excuses himself. He yells from the bathroom, ''Heeeeeey. Heeeey," loud enough for other patrons to hear, and I get up to help. Turns out he wants the photographer to take pictures of him by the bathroom.
I say to Mike, ''He keeps posing."
''He's a poser," Mike says, smiling.
When Jordan returns, I tell him I like a song he released in 1999 called ''Give It To You." He tells me he came up with a dance for the track before he had even recorded it.
''I said, 'Let me come up with dance steps. . .' " he says. ''If I ever sing it, I'll have some hot [expletive]."
Jordan is soon recognized by a man at the restaurant who says, ''Jordan. Hello. I know you." The man starts to explain how they know each other but gives up when he sees Jordan's blank stare.
Moving on, Mike and I decide to talk about love, about Jordan's wife, whom Jordan met when he was about 12.
''I went to her family's house for meals," Jordan says. ''They loved me."
I tell him that marriage scares me, and Jordan, sipping another beer, looks like he's just noticed me for the first time. He puts his hand to my face and tries to push the hair out of my eyes, but his aim is off and he's hitting me in the eyebrow. I ask him how he knew he wanted to marry his wife and what makes a good partner.
He says, very slowly, ''OK. What's the question?"
I remind him.
He answers, ''You . . . want a wife . . . who is not . . . cheat-ful. . ." Then he makes a face at the camera.
Mike goes outside to flag a cab for Jordan. We follow him out and say our goodbyes, and Jordan whispers the aforementioned quick invite in my ear.
I squeal ''Jordan!" in a falsetto I forgot I had, pretending like it's not 2006, like he's not 35, and like we don't know better.
|
January 6th, 2006
11:06 am - 12th Night and You-Know-What
That's right- it's my birthday. Can you believe I hit the quarter century mark at 5:25 this afternoon? Yeah, me neither. I know 25 years is the silver anniversary, but is it also the silver birthday?
I was going to wake up early and treat myself to my favorite breakfast in NY at Veselka (world's best pancakes, scrambled eggs, and hash) but I decided against it. Cash is running seriously low since my roommate won't be able to give me his half of the rent until the 12th (which was due on the 1st, mind you). He overdrew his account and now it's frozen for the rest of the week. My bank account just covered the full rent along with a smattering of bills that were due- my family's 3 cell phones, cable/phone/internet, car insurance, my college loan (a no interest loan, thank god), and electricity. Within the next few days I dread receiving all of those bills yet again in my mailbox (plus a new one- gas, because I was finally able to get the stove hooked up last month). It's a vicious little monthly cycle it is. So what exactly are the perks and benefits of being 25 again?
Then I was going to treat myself to lunch outside the confines of my office's "break room," but it didn't seem sensible to let a giant bowl of chicken salad in my fridge go bad. Time to tighten the belt and live a bit more frugally, Stevens, birthday or not. I had also planned on treating myself to a Dunkin Donuts coffee and chocolate chip muffin during my morning break, but like a dummy I went and left my free coupons at home.
I wrote into their website a few weeks ago because the muffins at the Dunkin Donuts on 8th Avenue were deplorable. All undercooked and absolutely no crusty sugar sprinkled on top- they were about as bland as melba toast. They call that a muffin? Someone get quality control on line one, stat! I went into consumer reports mode and took it upon myself to let DD HQ know what was going down at one of their branches. Two weeks later I received 4 coupons for a free medium coffee and my choice of bagel, donut, or muffin. Honestly, I just wanted the muffin situation rectified; the coupons were a surprise bonus. But not much of a bonus when you leave them in the top drawer of your desk on the morning you want to use one.
Aside from being my birthday, it's a very special day for a Sloshball alumnus, Mr. Eli Roth. A very good friend to my brother back in his NYU days, Eli is releasing his second horror movie today (his first was another low-grade horror flick called Cabin Fever). For movie number two, Eli delivers to us "Hostel," and it's even getting a nationwide release. If you watch TV, you've probably seen an ad or two for it over the last few weeks. It seems like any horror movie released these days, even if it garners awful reviews like The Fog, manages to open reasonably well, so I think it's going to be successful. It only cost 5 million to make. They'll have no problem making a profit on it, but the big question is, "Where will it rank in the weekend box office?" I wouldn't be all that shocked if it came in at number one. I know Kong and Narnia are raking in a lot of dough these days, but holiday vacation's over and the kids are back in school. With recent horror movies opening so well of late, anything could happen.
Hostel looks and sounds extremely gorey. These young guys go to Slovakia to check out the girls and end up becoming victims where people pay $25,000 to torture their captives any way they like. Graphic, disturbing and stomach-churning? You betchya!
Eli is one of the most talented and overt self-promoters I've ever met. It's really amazing to see the guy work a crowd and sell himself to even the most skeptical of audiences. I remember meeting him back when I was 12 years old, and even as a sophomore in college he was always "on" and had energy and charisma to spare. He's been able to package his talents well over the years and make quite a name for himself, and now he has Quentin Tarantino exec-producing his movies. He's gone from taking out the catcher during a muddy sloshball game to spending Christmas day at Quentin's house with The RZA.
So what's up for tonight? All this week I couldn't decide where I wanted to go for dinner. If I can't go out for breakfast or lunch, at least I know I'll eat like a king tonight, but where? Turkish or BBQ? Falafel and doner kebabs or pulled pork and macaroni and cheese? After much inner-debate, I decided on Turkish, and I found a place whose kitchen is open till 11 so Nick can come (his show gets off early on Fridays at 10). I invited a bunch of people, and I think a little less than half will be able to come. Unfortunately a lot of my old college roommates are out of town, and I was really looking forward to seeing them. And being a Friday, a lot of people are heading out for the weekend or already have other plans. I still think I'll be able to round up a dinner party of 8 or 9, so I think it's going to be a great night. My only reservation about the party is that very few of my friends who are coming know each other, so the beginning of the evening could be a hair stilted. But I figure once we start eating all that delicious food and the raki starts to flow freely, we'll all be blood brothers by the time the waiter brings out the baklava for dessert.
|
December 30th, 2005
10:58 pm - Party Responsibly, People!
Take it easy this New Year's Eve, folks, or you could wake up the next morning like THIS WOMAN.
|
12:12 pm - Further Lunch-Time Musings
While we're on the subject...
I've had a LOT of free time at work this week (and when I say free time, I mean I've had about 30 minutes of actual work given to me for the entire week) so I spent a lot of it on Tuesday researching restaurants and food in NYC on Citysearch. They have their annual editor and reader rankings for the best (fill in food here) of the year. Best Burger, best fries, best place to bring a large party, etc. It's a very thorough website, and if you start reading user reviews, you can be on there for hours before you know the time has passed.
I now have lists and lists of all these places I want to patronize now. I realize that with my limited spending powers, it will be a long time before I make it to each place to sample their cuisine, but I'm going to print up one giant list, put it over my desk at home, and start checking them off. By the time I make it to the 4th best burrito in NY, the eatery will probably be out of business by then, but I'll give it my best shot.
There was one place, The Shake Shack in Madison Sq. Park (not really anywhere near Madison Sq. Garden, strangely) that was mention numerous times for its hot dogs, burgers, and, obviously, its shakes. From the write-upI knew it really was just a shack and that everything was eaten outdoors, but being NYC and all, I figured it would be open year-round. Wrong! Assume nothing, people. I walked about 20 minutes down to the Shake Shake only to find that it was closed from November until the beginning of April. I got some good mid-day exercise out of it, but any calories I burned were rapidly replenished by 2 slices of pizza from a pizza joint on 7th and 28th I used to love when I worked at Astralwerks. Come April Fools' Day, though, you'll know where to find me on my lunch hour. Snacking at The Shack.
Earlier in the week I passed by Gray's Papaya. I had read some good recommendations of their hotdogs, but I wasn't that impressed. They tasted just like any other hotdog. What was special was their 2 dogs and a 14 oz. drink for $2.75. Of course, I got the papaya juice, as it's my favorite and I can hardly ever find it. Their juice didn't taste like the store-bought papaya nectar I mix at home with water, but it was mysteriously sweet and refreshing.
By far the best hotdog I've found in NY so far (and no, Nathan's wasn't that great, either) was at a tiny 5x8 hotdog shop next to where the Fung Wah Chinatown bus picks up and drops off its passengers. The biggest, tastiest, most plump dog I've had in a long time, and it was only $1! I think the pirce was almost as good as the dog itself. If you ever take the Fung Wah, be sure to stop by and get a dog there- you won't regret it.
OK, I think that's enough food talk for one afternoon. I can't help it- you spend all day reading restaurant reviews describing all your favorite foods, and your mind, along with your salivary glands, get unwillfully snared in a single track.
|
11:41 am - Storming The White Castle
I haven't had a lot of time to go food shopping since I got back late Monday night, so I've had to eat out for lunch every day.
Yesterday I stopped by White Castle for some mini-burgers and fries. They're totally inferior to Krystal Burger, but after seeing Harold and Kumar I had to give them a shot. The meat patty is so tiny and microscopically thin- it's almost not even a solid. It's brown and runny like an old egg, but still it tasted all right. You just pop them in your mouth and they slide right down as if your throat was pre-coated with Crisco (Mmmm, that sounds terrible!).
I actually chose to eat my White Castle in the dining room. Whenever you choose to dine in a cheap fast food "restaurant" in NYC, you're always going to hear or see something out of the ordinary.
First, I loved how the big sign in White Castle says "No hanging around the restaurant" instead of the usual "No Loitering." I guess they figure people who eat at White Castle don't know the definition of the word "loitering."
Near the end of my meal, I heard all these beeps coming from the front counter, and a loud voice came over a loudspeaker. A woman started yelling over the PA system, saying the White Castle was monitored by security cameras and that she wanted the group of people "from the clinic" to step away from the counter and leave the premises immediately. Otherwise, the police would be called and there would be trouble. Everytime the secuity woman spoke, her voice was prefaced by an annoyingly loud and shrill emergency tone. It was not designed for 2-way conversations.
The so-called "clinic people" at the counter started yelling and making a scene as they talked back to the security camera, and the PA woman came back on to argue with them and to tell them to watch their mouths. The whole incident was really strange, as I had never seen a fast-food joint with such high security. The PA woman kept blabbing on about how a police cruiser had been dispatched to the location and blah blah blah until the "clinic people" finally decided it was in their best interest to leave. Even after they were gone, the security voice kept going on and on about how White Castle was under tight security. Enough already! The trouble-makers are gone, so just let us sit here in the pitiful fast-food dining room and let us enjoy our unhealthy lunch in peace!
|
December 28th, 2005
04:16 pm - Don't Buy That!
http://www.slate.com/id/2132516/?nav=navoa
A great article from Slate on why giving someone clothes for Christmas is a bad idea. Amanda Fortini is one hell of a writer. Her article in 2003 on low-rise jeans was great, and her article this past summer on warm-weather clothing was the most popular Slate article of the year.
|
03:25 pm - Super Wednesday Survey
1.) When showering, do you start the water and then get in or get in and start the water?
Start the water then get in. No way I'm getting in before it has a chance to heat up unless we're in the dog days of summer.
2.) Do you read the labels on your shampoo bottle?:
I glance at them when I buy them to make sure I'm getting the right one.
3.) Do you moan in the shower like the people on the herbal essence commercial?:
No, though I do break out in song every once in a while, and I've been told my voice induces orgasms in other men and women.
4.) Have you ever showered with someone of the opposite sex?:
Yes, and it was amazing.
5.) Have you ever been forced to shower with one of your siblings?:
No, and I hope I never will be.
6.) Have you ever brushed your teeth in the shower?:
I never even thought to do that!
7.) Have you ever dropped your soap on your foot?:
It usually lands with a thud and a bruise on the tub floor.
8.) How old do you look?:
Without my beard I look really young.
9.) How old do you act?:
People have always said how mature I am, though I beg to differ and think I'm trapped at age 13.
10.) What's the last song you sang?
Something Christmas-related
11.) Have you recently become a member of anything?:
Just got a New York Public Library card. Yeah, I'm a badass.
12.) What are your plans for the weekend?
Taking a bus (Nick and Emily are taking the car to VT) back to Braintree Friday night and spending the New Year at home. Exciting stuff!
13.) Do you kiss with your eyes opend or closed?:
Guess I'd do it closed. It's been a while, but yeah, I'd close 'em.
14.) Have you ever ridden a mechanical bull?:
Never.
15.) Do you ever intentionally vomit after eating?:
No.
16.) If you were working on a pirate ship, what would you most likely be?:
The Gov'ner!
17.) Have you ever called anyone a slut?:
No.
18) How many times have you been in a relationship with someone from the opposite sex?:
Once. Ouch, that's right.
19). Have you ever smuggled something into America?:
No. I don't think a Tirkish rug rolled up in my suitcase really counts.
20). Does playing the guitar make a girl/guy more attractive?:
Absolutely not! Rather, it makes me detest them and want to kill them.
21). Do you live in a city with a good sports team?:
Oh yes.
22). Have you ever finished off the popcorn?:
Who hasn't???
23). How many people do you think would come to your funeral?:
Impossible to say, though I think I'll get fewer attendees than Rose Parks.
24). How many of them would come just to make sure you're dead?:
None.
25). Do you have more enemies or more friends?
Nope.
26.) Have you ever sent an anonymous letter?:
No.
27.) Can you fix your own car?:
No...I really wish I could, though. That's something I should know more about.
28.) Have you ever turned someone down for a date?:
No. It's not like I have offers streaming in...
29.) Are you smarter than your friends?:
There are all different kinds of intelligences, and we probably even out when it's all said and done.
30.) Have you ever stolen anything from your friends?:
No.
31.) Have you ever been to jail?:
No, and I don't plan to go there anytime soon.
32.) Do you like the taste of beer?
Not really. The first can/bottle is OK, but it tatses prgressively worse to me thereafter. Shouldn't it be the other way around?
33.) When you see a car accident, do you slow down and try to see?:
No, because people who slow down to rubberneck and cause massive highweay delays irk me to no end.
34.) Have you ever died or killed someone in a dream?
At least a few times. I wake up all stressed out or in a cold sweat. Restful!
35.) Have you ever given to charity?:
Yup.
36.) Would you kill a dog for $1000?:
Absolutely not.
37.) Do you sometimes get depressed?:
Absolutely.
38.) Do you live with your parents?:
No, I'm on my own for now in NY.
39.) Do you have plans for your future:
It's still all very much up in the air. I have ideas and inklings, though I'll be 25 in less than 2 weeks (gasp!) and I should have a much more concrete plan or strategy at this point.
|
03:18 pm - Rid That Rosie, Please
She should never be in a Broadway musical to begin with! Especially while co-starring with Harvey Fierstein.
From EW.COM
-----------
Unlike TV and movies, where famous actors' mortifying mistakes are left on the editing-room floor, the Great White Way's not nearly as forgiving. Rosie O'Donnell apparently missed more than a couple of lines during a recent performance of Fiddler on the Roof; she missed an entire scene, which made her throw up a little in her mouth. (Seriously, yo! Read her blog!)
|
December 23rd, 2005
02:32 pm - The Week
Well, hallelujah and give praise to Bejesus, the NYC Transit Strike of '05 is officially over and the city is now attempting to get back to normal (if anything here was ever normal to begin with).
I managed to get myself stuck out in Bushwick for the first day of the strike. I tell people this and they all say, "What? How did you not know about the strike? Don't you watch the news?!" Well, yes, I try my best to keep up with the news (though I rarely get it from the TV these days) and I pride myself on being well-informed, but I have a fairly good excuse for what happened.
I drove home to Braintree early Saturday morning to do Christmas prep work around the house and to organize/bring in all the gifts for the homeless veteran my family adopted this year for the holidays. I didn't check my email, the internet, or a TV news show while I was gone. The strike didn't happen on Friday, so I assumed they were just going to talk it out.
I drove back to NY late Sunday night, got in well after midnight and quickly hit the sack for I had work early next morning. I got home from work around 7 that night and promptly went to bed for a 4.5 hour nap (I was exhausted). I woke up around 1230, made some dinner, watched an episode of The West Wing, and banged out my last set of Christmas cards.
When I was walking downstairs in my building the next morning, I thought it was a little odd that the kids on the first floor were still hanging out in the hallways at 8am, but I shook it off and figured they were skipping school as I hastily made my way to the post office (those cards needed prompt sending and I was fresh out of stamps!).
After my postal business, I walked to my train station and saw it all closed and chained up. I thought, "Hmm, maybe the strike DID happen." Just to be sure, I walked to the next station and saw the same thing, and then I knew there was no way I'd be able to get into work for the day. Sure, I have a car, but who wants to drive into that madness? I would still need 3 other people in the car with me just to get over a bridge onto the island.
So I took the day off, watched all the Strike coverage on TV, got a lot of work done around the apartment, and sent out all my emailed Christmas cards. I'd say it was a rather productive day!
Once the evening rush hour ended, I packed a bag and hopped into my car with my roommate, Adam, as we ventured into Manhattan, where we both figured we'd be staying until the strike ended. Luckily, his girlfriend lives in the lower east side, and Nick lives by Union Sq., so we both had places to stay the rest of the week.
We had some out-of-this-world turkey burgers and fries at Nick's Tuesday night, and Wednesday morning I made the 30-minute trek from 18th and 3rd to 36th and 7th to my new temp job (Which so far has been great, by the way. Transit Strike + Week Before Christmas= Many people gone and very little to do). It was a cold walk on Wednesday, but I can't complain. People who had to walk across a bridge and then uptown or those who had to hike downtown from the upper east or west sides really had it bad.
I went out to finish up my Christmas shopping during my lunch hours and after work, and it was so bewildering to see these big stores on 5th and 6th avenue right near Times Sq. with their doors closed and the lights turned off in prime-shopping time with only a few days till Christmas. Even though I was away in Cyprus during the 2003 blackout and I didn't get to experience that first-hand, this 3-day strike probably activated a lot of similar memories from those electric-less 36 hours two and a half years ago.
I spent Wednesday night up at Danielle's place, who fortunatly lives only a few blocks from where I work. We just hung out, ate great Chinese food, and ponched out on the sofa for most of the night watching TV, which was exactly what I felt like doing. God, I needed that. Unfortunately, her place was northwest of my office, so my walk back to Nick's was even longer. But I wasn't alone- even at midnight there were people walking, biking, and rollerblading all over the city.
Nick, done with all his week's work at NBC, and Emily skipped town Thursday morning on the MetroNorth train up to her parent's house in Westport, where they hopped in a car and drove the rest of the way up to Braintree. I had some last-minute calendar shopping to do after work, and then I hiked back home. Thankfully it's progressively warmed up over the last 3 days, so Tuesday's teen temperatures and hellacious winds (which are the real killers, people!) were replaced by temps in the 30s and a calm urban breeze. Still, when I got back to the apartment, fatigue came upon me like the plague and I had to nap it out for an hour. I watched a little of my netflixed 24 last night with Ponch lying across me (she rarely shuts up with the meowing anymore- it can really drive you mad after a while. Wat once was a cute and endearing personality quirk has quickly become grounds for pet-homicide) and called it a night.
Today, they're letting everyone in the office out early at 3:15. It's better than 5, but I'm still not going to be able to get a good jump on the traffic that will soon seize all of NYC's outbound roadways. I have to subway it back to Nick's, load my stuff, the cat, and a bunch of their bags of Christmas presents into my car (3 trips right there) and then drive out to my Brooklyn apartment, where I'll have to load up my cat and anything else I need to bring home with me for the weekend to Braintree. I don't see me hitting the road home till 5, right in the heart of rush hour...on a Friday...2 days before Christmas. The 4-hour drive definitely ain't gonna be 4 hours today. If I can make it home by 10:30 I'll be satisfied.
|
December 22nd, 2005
03:26 pm - A Funny letter
This letter to Bill Simmons made me laugh really hard...
Remember the SNL skit from the 90's labeled "Steroid Olympics" and that guy tries to dead lift 900lbs and as he jerks up, both arms rip clean off his shoulders and are still attached to the barbell on the floor and blood is spurting out everywhere from his shoulder sockets ... I hope Damon's arm comes flying off while he is trying to make a throw home and his hand and arm are still attached to the ball as it weekly lands in front of A-Rods foot and then A-Rod vomits and passes out and Joe Torre has to come out and give mouth to mouth to A-Rods bloated purple lips ... That would ease the pain of this trade
-- Mark Faselle, Dallas, TX
|
December 20th, 2005
10:36 am - Best Gap Ad Ever Made
Directed by Spike Jonze, of course. Here it is.
|
December 19th, 2005
08:13 pm - It's A Wonderful George Bush, Sr. Life
Saturday 8/7c, December 24
IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE
NBC marks a milestone for the nation's visually impaired as the network presents this exclusive and special telecast of Frank Capra's 1946 holiday classic, "It's a Wonderful Life," starring James Stewart, Donna Reed and Lionel Barrymore. ******Through a process of Descriptive TheatreVision, the special presentation will be described for the blind and visually impaired by former President George Bush.*******
----------------------------------------
Man, NBC is practically begging someone to parody this...
|
07:52 pm - A Funny SNL Sketch/Video???
http://www.youtube.com/watch.php?v=IggTu7kV7No
Is it true? Hard to believe, but yes, I think it is. Easily the funniest thing on SNL so far this season. Enjoy.
|
December 13th, 2005
04:16 pm - The January STUFF has arrived!
And here I am in the January issue of STUFF, in my full corn-rowed, battle-rap-mode glory on page 22. (I accidentally typed "battle rape" initially- oops!)
In an almost unrelated note, it's crazy to me how the magazine costs $4.99 off the rack, but you can get a year's subscription for a mere $9.97.
Even though it's the Wheel of Shame and all, I'm still mulling over whether I should cut it out, frame it, and tack it up no the wall just for the hell of it.
|
December 8th, 2005
10:35 pm - Property Values and Police Choppers
I was just walking home to my apartment after seeing Nick Kroll's comedy show at Rififi, and I looked up to see a black police copter hovering over my block. See it? Yeah, I kinda head it, too. They haven't quite perfected the "whisper" mode yet. A few fly-bys or "hover-bys", as I like to call them, and the property value of this area is really gonna start going up. You can just feel the oncoming rent hikes, people.
|
December 6th, 2005
03:52 pm - Scoundrels
I just read that John Lithgow is being replaced in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels by Jonathan Pryce in mid-January. I saw a weekend matinée performance back in August and I really loved the show. I had wanted to see a few other shows, but TKTS weren't selling any tickets to them that day, so I went to Scoundrels, not really knowing what to expect.
It was Lithgow's co-star, who plays Steve Martin's part, who won the Tony award and stole most of the show. In fact, Lithgow didn't even perform the day I saw the show. He took the matinée off and was replaced by his understudy, who was still terrific and didn't miss a beat. I never found myself thinking, "Fifty bucks for this! Man, I sure wish Lithgow were here."
But as I watched the show, I kept thinking how perfect John O'Hurley of Seinfeld and Dancing With The Stars fame would be for the role. I kept hoping that when Lithgow was eventually replaced, someone would be smart enough to recommend or cast John O'Hurley in the role. Well, it looks like it's going to Jonathan Pryce instead. He's certainly no slouch-a Broadway veteran and the original Engineer from Miss Saigon. He'll be great, but for some reason I really wanted to see O'Hurley get the part. I wonder if he was ever considered...
|
November 30th, 2005
05:00 pm - Bat Mitvah Overdrive
From today's NY Daily News. These bat mitzvahs are getting a little out of control...
_____________________________________
History will forever record Elizabeth Brooks' bat mitzvah as "Mitzvahpalooza."
For his daughter's coming-of-age celebration last weekend, multimillionaire Long Island defense contractor David H. Brooks booked two floors of the Rainbow Room, hauled in concert-ready equipment, built a stage, installed special carpeting, outfitted the space with Jumbotrons and arranged command performances by everyone from 50 Cent to Tom Petty to Aerosmith.
I hear it was garish display of rock 'n' roll idol worship for which the famously irascible CEO of DHB Industries, a Westbury-based manufacturer of bulletproof vests, sent his company jet to retrieve Aerosmith's Steven Tyler and Joe Perry from their Saturday gig in Pittsburgh.
I'm also told that in honor of Aerosmith (and the $2 million fee I hear he paid for their appearance), the 50-year-old Brooks changed from a black-leather, metal-studded suit - accessorized with biker-chic necklace chains and diamonds from Chrome Hearts jewelers - into a hot-pink suede version of the same lovely outfit.
The party cost an estimated $10 million, including the price of corporate jets to ferry the performers to and from. Also on the bill were The Eagles' Don Henley and Joe Walsh performing with Fleetwood Mac's Stevie Nicks; DJ AM (Nicole Richie's fiance); rap diva Ciara and, sadly perhaps (except that he received an estimated $250,000 for the job), Kenny G blowing on his soprano sax as more than 300 guests strolled and chatted into their pre-dinner cocktails.
"Hey, that guy looks like Kenny G," a disbelieving grownup was overheard remarking - though the 150 kids in attendance seemed more impressed by their $1,000 gift bags, complete with digital cameras and the latest video iPod.
For his estimated $500,000, I hear that 50 Cent performed only four or five songs - and badly - though he did manage to work in the lyric, "Go shorty, it's your bat miztvah, we gonna party like it's your bat mitzvah."
At one point, I'm told, one of Fitty's beefy bodyguards blocked shots of his boss performing and batted down the kids' cameras, shouting "No pictures! No pictures!" - even preventing Brooks' personal videographers and photographers from capturing 50 Cent's bat-miztvah moment.
"Fitty and his posse smelled like an open bottle of Hennessy," a witness told told me, adding that when the departing rapper prepared to enter his limo in the loading dock, a naked woman was spotted inside.
I'm told that Petty's performance - on acoustic guitar - was fabulous, as was the 45-minute set by Perry and Tyler, who was virtuosic on drums when they took the stage at 2:45 a.m. Sunday.
Henley, I hear, was grumpy at the realization that he'd agreed to play a kids' party.
I'm told that at one point Brooks leapt on the stage with Tyler and Perry, who responded with good grace when their paymaster demanded that his teenage nephew be permitted to sit in on drums. At another point, I'm told, Tyler theatrically wiped sweat off Brooks' forehead - and then dried his hand with a flourish.
Yesterday, Brooks disputed many details provided to me by Lowdown spies at the affair and by other informed sources, scrawling on a fax to me: "All dollar figures vastly exaggerated."
He added: "This was a private event and we do not wish to comment on details of the party."
|
12:44 pm - What's The Weather?
Holy amazing unseasonable weather, Aquaman!
It's 12:30 in the afternoon on November 30th and it's 62 degrees and sunny outside.
After last week's bitterly cold holiday weather, where did THIS come from???
|
12:42 pm - Turkey for Life (or at least until it sours)
When my brother and I left to drive back to NY Sunday night, my Mom sent some turkey home with us. But this wasn't turkey left over from Thanksgiving. She went out to buy a 12 lb. turkey on Saturday to make for us to bring back to NY for sandwiches with her signature stuffing. They didn't have any 12-pounders, so she bought a 20-pounder instead. A 20 pound turkey for 2 people!
My Mom went to put it in the oven Saturday night and she was only preparing it with salt, pepper, and butter with a lot of water in the bottom of the pan. Nick, the uber-chef, saw this and stepped in immediately, dousing the turkey with just about every reasonable spice he found in the cabinets.
After we got home from dinner that night, we checked the turkey and it seemed to be a little overdone, but with all the water in the pan, it was still profoundly moist. Nick went to cut it up, and I never saw meat fall off the bone that easily in my life. He literally touched the turkey and went to lift it up a few inches to cut it and the meat jumped off the bone to the bottom of the pan. You could grab a bone in the turkey and lift it right out of the bird, nothing attached. This was the juiciest turkey I'd ever seen.
Mom divided it up for us on Sunday, so now the 2 of us have at least 7-8 pounds of turkey each. And don't forget, a giant portion of stuffing. I love them both, but I don't know how I can eat all of it before A.) it goes bad or B.) I get sick of it. At least I have my roommate, Adam, to help me get through it all.
This isn't one of those small baggies either, people. That's a jumbo.
|
November 29th, 2005
03:58 pm - Missed Opportunity
My brother was late getting into the radio station yesterday because of a voice-over audition and he missed an interview with this girl:
Penthouse Pet of the Year, Jamie Lynn. Not only was she there to talk about Tuesday night's Penthouse party in NYC, but she also got buck naked for a good 5 minutes in the studio. And Nick got there right after her interview ended when she was heading out the door! Awful, awful timing. He nabbed a group shot while she was heading out
but by then the "show" was over. For cryin' out loud...
In related news, Nick and the rest of the show hosts got free VIP passes to this Penthouse Pet of the Year Party going down tonight in Manhattan, but none of them can go because it conflicts with a NJ Devils/Boston Bruins game that they've been giving tickets away for the last 2 weeks. Can you believe that?!!! They all have to miss the party for a Devils game in the Meadowlands in New Jersey.
I was really hoping Nick could give his party passes to me so I could go, but I think he has to be the one to use it. We were thinking Nick's friend, Oscar, who looks a lot like Nick, could pose as him and we could gain access that way, but I don't know if we'll go through with it or not.
Seriously, I would pay hundreds of dollars to go to that party tonight. A VIP pass to a party filled with Penthouse pets and hundreds of other drop-dead gorgeous, scantily clad models? Man, I can't even think about it anymore. I'm getting too upset.
Sorry for the excessiveness, but oh good lord, they're real
|
01:26 pm - The Voice-Over Guys
MOVIE
The 5 most familiar movie voice-over guys got together and took part in this silly little pre-awards show movie a few years ago. It's so unsettling to see an actual person behind the voice you hear almost every day. It messes with your mind a little bit, and I'd just laugh uncontrollably now and again for no reason. It's like they're revealing how they did some great special effect in a movie, and you go, "Wow!", but it's just meeting the guys in person. Worth a quick watch.
|
November 28th, 2005
11:27 pm - Facebook.com ROOOLS!
Facebook.com adding the photo album feature to its arsenal will soon lead to a revolution. Or maybe it already has, and I just missed it because it wasn't televisede. If the site wasn't already extremely useful, addictive and highly-trafficked beforehand, I can't imagine how much it's been used in the last month since people have been posting and labeling their pictures. That just pushed it over the edge. I know myspace is now, like, the fifth most highly-trafficked website on the web, but facebook is really blooming for the 18-25 set. And now I hear there's a high school facebook? They obviously have their sights set on world domination.
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
aquajungle's journal
